Why Discomfort Is Good For You
The Difference Between Pain and Discomfort
Understanding the difference between pain and discomfort is essential for your physical and mental well-being. Pain should be avoided at all costs and we do this instinctively. Your body has an automatic response system to protect you from it, like when you pull your hand away after touching something hot- you make that move before you (or your conscious brain) realises it’s hot. Discomfort, however, is a different experience. It’s first registered by the mind, and then we choose whether to move. It’s in this space where inner strength can be discovered and developed.
What is Yin Yoga?
I learned how to stay in discomfort through my practice of Yin Yoga. While living and teaching in Kuwait, I worked with a yoga instructor, Sara, who had a deep love for Yin Yoga. At the time, I didn’t know much about it, but thanks to her, I now use it’s teaching in all of my classes and with all of my clients. I even become a Yin Yoga teacher myself.
In Yin Yoga, we hold poses for up to 10 minutes, using props like blocks, bolsters, and blankets to bring the ground up to support your body in each pose. We never aim for the full stretch—only about 70%—which allows the body to relax more deeply as time passes. Though supported, the stretch can still feel intense as the body releases into the pose.
Why It Works
(skip this bit, if you just want to learn about discomfort)
When we stretch dynamically, reflexes kick in to prevent overstretching. ‘Golgi tendons’ and ‘muscle spindles’ work together to create a reflex that contracts the muscle if it stretches too far, too fast. This is called the “stretch reflex.” In Yin Yoga, however, we enter a meditative state that soothes the central nervous system. This reduces the urgency of the stretch reflex, allowing you to hold the pose longer and deepen the stretch without risking damage.
Back to discomfort:
So, when we are in these deep, often intense poses, we are encouraged to hold stillness. But when something feels uncomfortable, we instinctively don’t hold ourselves in discomfort, do we? We move!
Yes we do. But with mindful practise there are many benefits as to why we should not.
What to do when it's all too much
Becoming the observer
In my Yin Yoga classes, we practise becoming ‘The Observer.’ It is a powerful technique to tame the ‘monkey brain’- The part of the brain that speeds off down a ‘what shall I have for dinner?’ side road and drowns in an undercurrent of chattering and commentary.
We learn how to separate ourselves from all sounds. Be that sounds outside of the room- birds singing, gravel under tyres, leaves knocking each other in the wind. Sounds inside of the room- music, the hum of the building, the person next to you breathing. And any sounds that you can hear on your mat- your own breath or heartbeat and the sounds inside of your head. We all have sounds in our mind, or we wouldn’t have a mind but we can observe them without adding further commentary or opinion.
We learn how to let all of these sounds come and go, like clouds floating in to view, they all float away and out of view again.
We don’t chase clouds. Why chase thoughts and opinions? Tomorrow they will be gone. And if they’ll be gone tomorrow, they can be gone in a moment too. It’s the attachment to a thought that keeps it alive, and here’s a trick: It’s not the thought you need, it’s the result of the thought, learn what you need and move on. Let that thought go.
Why let go?
This lesson became clear to me during a ten-day silent Vipassana meditation in Indonesia. We handed over all our possessions, lived in silence, and practiced letting go of every attachment—positive or negative. Attachments, whether cravings or aversions, create deep emotional grooves, like lines carved into sandstone. The longer we hold onto a thought, the deeper the groove. But if we learn to let go, these grooves will eventually erode and disappear.
Akashas were explained to me as this:
“Imagine a piece of sandstone and I draw a line in the stone with a sharp object like a key. This line is a thought. The more I think, the deeper the line. This is an akasha. Positive and negative attachments will always equal misery, so whether this is a craving or an aversion, both thought types will cause an akasha. The law of nature means that the top layer will erode and continue to erode with time until the akasha completely disappears, but only if we stop the continued thought process otherwise the line continues to be drawn and stays. No craving no aversion.. No craving no aversion.. No craving no aversion.”
Why Stay With Discomfort?
There are two key reasons to stay with discomfort: physical and emotional release.
Physical Release
Discomfort often stems from tightness in the body. Holding a pose, breathing deeply, and staying relaxed allows the muscles and ligaments to stretch and release. The next time you try the same pose, it will feel slightly easier. This is why avoiding stretches because you're not flexible only makes things worse in the long run.
Moreover, Yin Yoga stretches not only muscles but also fascia—a layer of connective tissue surrounding muscles, bones, and ligaments. When we stretch, we allow the fascia to release knots and tension, much like getting a deep massage.
Emotional Release
Emotions are stored in cells and tissues. I call these "issues in the tissues." Holding deep poses for a long time can bring up these stored emotions, allowing them to be released. Many students experience tearfulness after a class, not because of something happening in the moment, but because a past emotion has been set free.
By staying with discomfort, we can uncover the real reasons behind it—whether it’s a physical tightness or an emotional block. With practice, we learn to identify the specific emotion behind the discomfort, and once we do, the discomfort often fades away.
When we hold deep poses for a long time, our mind kicks in to make us move. It is far easier to say to ourselves ‘this hurts, so I have to move’ rather than, ‘I can feel an uncomfortable emotion coming up, and I feel I should move to avoid it’. We simply don’t get taught this in our world! The ‘this hurts, so I have to move’ thought- is a misunderstanding.
Once we have learnt this, we can then learn to how stay with the discomfort, to watch it. This is where the magic happens. We give ourselves the opportunity to learn the real reason behind the discomfort. It is very common for students to have an emotional release at the end of a yoga class, often feeling tearful without knowing why. With practice we do learn why, we learn to identify the emotion behind aversion to particular pose (the issue in the tissue) and once we’ve learnt the why, the discomfort tends to go away.
This understanding of emotion is incredibly powerful and important. Imagine if you could get rid of all the emotional crap that’s weighing you down by moving, big hint - You can!
Freeing Yourself
The important thing to remember here is that any emotions that come up in class are not emotions that you are experiencing right now. They are the release of a past emotion. So continuing to be the observer so as not to create or deepen an akasha is key. This is your power, this is your freedom.
Emotions are just emotions, they are tools to understanding,
they do not define or own you.
More on how the emotional and physical body are connected
How can we stay with discomfort?
When we decide to stay with discomfort, we realise that it is the body that is giving the signals but the desire to move comes from the mind.
Therefore, we must learnt how to calm the monkey mind.
Here are two techniques I teach my clients:
Focus on the Breath: We do not ignore the part of the body that is asking for your attention, instead we answer and nourish it with the breath. Inhale and imagine sending your breath to the part of your body that feel discomfort. As you exhale, notice how the attention seeking part of your body relaxes and the discomfort quiets down. If the monkey mind turns up, allow it, watch it come and watch it go while you keep focusing on your breath.
Seek the Feeling as ‘The Observer’: Become the observer by observing your experience without adding commentary or opinion. Give the discomfort a name. For example, if you feel anger, frustration or sadness during a hip stretch, Imagine these words appearing as you identify them. Now ‘place’ these words next to you on your mat (anger, frustration, sadness). By identifying and observing the emotions rather than owning them, you separate yourself from them.
Final Thoughts
I hope this helps you understand how staying with discomfort can lead to both physical and emotional breakthroughs. If you have any questions, feel free to reach out, and I’ll be happy to help.
Charlette x